So Are You Single?

  • post Type / Young Humanists International
  • Date / 8 March 2016

Anya Overmann


“So are you single” you say
I clutch my drink tighter
My knuckles go whiter

You’re standing in the intersection of Society and Convention while I wait for the first bus out when you mention…

“So are you single”

“I am,” I say with half a smile
with half a pint left of guile

That’s just what you wanted to hear,
Things are going so well,
You text back to your bro:
“getting laid tonight I can tell”

I put down my drink and pick up my tab
Oh, I’ve heard worse
but this verse–
this one’s stuck in my head
–a script written for men from bar to bed
I’d explain what I mean but what you’ll hear
is not what I’ll have said
So instead,
I let you say it:

“You wanna get outta here?”

I’m already anticipating your look of perplexion I’m not moving in your direction, how DARE I incite such insurrection when I say–


And it kind of hits you like a truck
When you realize I’m not your easy fuck

I pick up my bag and you grab my arm
“Why not?” –not a question, but an accusation
My guiles all gone, poured out with my libation

I look you dead in the eyes and you know the truth is looming,
“I said I was single and your mistake was in assuming
my lack of commitment to another guy equates to my consuming
of you tonight, sir”

You look bewildered
Yeah I went off script,
I’m not dick-whipped

You can now see me waiting for that bus,
waiting to get away from the nightly show performed between players like us

You’re embarrassed.
Thought you had me bagged.
Thought you had it made.

When I pulled the plug on your fruitless thought,
I pulled the rug out from your ego– He was caught.

And as you struggled to come up with the words to save face,
to make space
between you and the woman that called you out for making her out to be an object
–a project to put your dick in–
All you could manage to say to me was “BITCH”
And I didn’t move a muscle
And I didn’t twitch
I took it all in thinking of all the things you could have said in between
to mean subject not object, ends not means.

“Am I single? Yes
Am I available upon request? No.”

And just like that, I turn and I go
to catch my bus
cuz for a man to know the truth worth of a woman,
She has to let it show.

Am I single? Yes.
Is that an open invitation? No.

Anya Overmann is an Ethical Humanist from Missouri, USA, and is IHEYO’s Social Media Officer.

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